Everyday we continue to teach our daughter manners, respect, how to share, love, and many other important values. Each day something new happens or she tests us in a way that we have to follow through on what we say. As hard as it is we have to do it. Two things have happened this week that have tested us on our calmness, sternness and on supporting each other.
When both Dad and I are home we often put baby A to bed together. We go to her bedroom, read books, calm down, change diaper, put pj's on, drink milk, brush teeth, sing her a lullaby and put her down. We love this routine and ritual. It is so calming for her and by the time we walk out of her room she is ready to go to bed.
As we were hanging out in the bed room sitting on the floor with Baby A standing between us, she decided to hit me. So I said our usual, "Bummer, 1 minute time out and picked her up and put her in the hall facing the wall." After one minute I said, "Time out is over I love you." In she walked with a somewhat mischevious smile on her face. She came and stood right b/w dad and I, facing Daddy. Now Daddy asked her to do something, I can't remember what it was, but it made her unhappy. She decided to bring her right arm back and slap him across the face. I'm not talking about a little, soft slap. I'm talking about the slap across the face you see on soap operas. I went, "uh" and Daddy stayed calm and said, "Time out, go in the hall." As soon as she was out of sight, he started into a silent laugh and I turned my head into the closet and laughed hysterically, but silently into my arm. Of course we don't want her to hear or see us laughing because that would be very encouraging for her. We had 1 min. to get our laughs out. When T.O. was over, she came in with a somewhat similar smile as before but laid on the floor waiting for her diaper change. Of course Daddy did say, "I love you." I guess those two time outs told her that she can't get away with hitting people. The rest of our bedtime routine went without a hitch.
Last night we were having dinner outside on the deck. You couldn't have asked for a more perfect evening. The weather was amazing, no wind, homemade stir fry, we had played outside all day and now we were enjoying each others company for dinner. Once Daddy and I were done with dinner we were just hanging out at the table as Baby A continued to eat. There were some things in the stir fry she didn't like, like those little corns. So if she got them in her mouth she would spit them in her hand and we would tell her to put it on her plate. Well, after a few times of this she decided to take some and drop it on the ground. She did this after I said, "You don't have to eat that, just put it on your plate." So I had to act fast and say, "bummer, we don't drop our food on the floor, dinner is over." I stood up and took her plate inside. This caused a raucous. She was super sad. She kept crying and saying, "My food, my dinner time." I so bad wanted to give it back to her because she rarely throws food on the floor and if she drops it in an accident I wouldn't take the plate. But this clearly wasn't an accident. She has to learn that we don't throw our food on the floor. So I let her cry. Daddy missed the whole thing so was unsure of what happened. As she continued to cry Daddy asked, "Did you throw your food on the ground." She said, "Yes." At least she admits it. Well after about 5 min. I was able to get her out of her seat and get ready to head up stairs. She saw a banana on the counter and started to stay, "My mana." So dad was all for giving her this, I wasn't. His concern was he didn't want her to go to bed hungry. I felt it was o.k. b/c she still had milk to eat and she did eat a lot of her dinner. As soon as she got the banana she was done crying.
What will the consequence of this be for us? I guess time will tell.
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